With trees around
Away from all kinships
Away from home
and away from comfort.
Away from people who designate me with roles and identity
I somehow felt liberated.
Away from materialism
Away from ritualism
Away from a society
Away from right and wrong
Away from people who breathe,
I was breathing
I was happily lost
Amidst nothing
I had no possession
I had no obsession
Amidst aestheticism
I was breathing
I was happily lost




Those love letters written with pencil,
That you sent me.
My grand dad’s age,
And his spectacles.
My favourite 5 year old white tee.
The crush I had for my favourite Actor.
Sun dipping down the horizon.
The bright light of the paper lantern.
That coldness of January,
and that spring fall of April!
The exuberance of being in a rock show,
that I used to visit oftenly.
The memory of my long gone lover,
I held closely to my heart.
Those brown dried leaves,
Falling down the tree.
It all does,
It all fades
Inception had its intention,
quite clear.
It all fades and is still fading
You are fading too
And I am fading too.
So, Make a dent in the universe
And lets give our existence some virtue..


There have been researches
About whether our mind controls us
Or we control our mind.
However, empirical evidences exist
For both the debates.
Conclusively, none is a fact.
Facts are permanent,
The stable ones
The certain ones.
Perhaps, facts are subjective too.
Subjectivism builds and is a blend of many factors.
If I exemplify this,
Both Freud and Erikson view anxiety in different ways, however both of their theories are widely accepted even today.
But which one holds relevance in which situation, is subjective and situational too.
So Subjectivism can never be a fact.
Facts that you hold in your life are subjective to your experiences, Your learnings.
And you lead each and every day based on them.

I was reading about the filter attenuation theory the other day,
And somehow my thoughts conflicted me,
I was wondering whether enlightenment is actually enlightenment or not.
What we perceive or chose to pay attention to, is barred by our subjective interests and the information that we filter out of all the stimuli and imbibe in ourselves is based on subjectivity too.

Considering the fact that all of us are unique in our own ways
Would you believe too, that this world would be a better place if we attend to issues in this world by keeping this notion in mind?
Considering that our mind controls us,
Can we get conditioned to the need of the society and eventually our mind will make us do the required deed?
Considering that we control our mind,
Can we change the way we attend to things and make this society or just one life  better??

This new year,
Is a blank slate
and the world out there needs more humanity and altruism.
However it all begins with the kind of thought and choice that we behold
So can we begin to do our bit in making our lives greater by this means.

Subjectivism would never leave our lives
Because that is, the life.
But it all begins with choosing what we pay attention to.
A deliberate attention,
Can do wonders.
So the gone is gone
And going is going and is yet to come.

For this year
And this life,
is a blank slate,
What picture you draw is in your hands!


Beneath my clothes,
Is my skin
Waiting to be recognised!
It’s smooth but there are marks
The apparent and the not so apparent too.
Waiting to be called, to be named!

My identity is diminishing
So hold my hand and stick to it
You might save me..
And I might halt,
And hold,
hold on to the belief.
Which was on the edge of the cliff
Peeping downwards in the ocean..
Just imagining what it would be like to throw it down.
Let it fall,
Fall so hard on the ground.
That nothing is left.
But as you might hold,
I might not let it fall.

Today here,
Lying beneath these stars of the galaxy,
On the wet sand.
I am trying to write my name.
Akin to what I did when I was 10,
But aye this realisation
Of Which i am apprehensive that this world,
Would take as a weakness.
Aye I realised,
This time when I write my name,
It doesn’t hold that meaning.
I don’t hold that pride.

So beneath the stars ,
And in front of the sea,
I thought What am I losing.
Striving through the hustle and bustle
I sat there.
And listened,
Listened to the noise.
The Noise that usually is disturbing.
I listened to that noise…
And it was soothing that day.

Me putting in the thoughts
The rush of a million thoughts,
Thoughts that aggravate through this noise.
I laugh at me!
Laughing that the process began again.
But I paused and told myself
“I don’t need to know Whats right”.
Beyond the right and wrong that I assign to my thoughts,
I sat and just thought what I think of.
Initially I thought it is a puddle of water that can be crossed,
But oh I realised its a whole god damn ocean
Which can never be free,
Can never flow and have this sky over it.
So I conceal.

Beneath the dress I wear
Are my under garments.
I am not so sure if you ,
Affirm and conform and believe
But this is what defines me!

The mark on the arm and the wrist
Signifies strength.
The mole on my back
Was my birth mark.
And each inch is what is not meant to be hidden and seen through the eyes of lust,
But just love and humanity.
Usual ways of society,
Tell me to cover the cleavage and my upper thighs. 
So okay I do it.
“Yes sir”!
But what about those which can’t be hidden
And are the part of me at par?

But I still hope you’d come and hold my hand,
Like that shooting star,
Giving hopes and rising desires.
I opened my eyes lying there,
The fingers of my hands muddled,
I see the sky full of stars,
I feel the fresh breeze.
And the shooting star whispering a million words in my ear.
Not anyone that I know is around me.
I know myself there.
And I am not scared.
Because they are the ones who scare me,
They take away what I am from me.
They do not let me define myself the way I want to,
And they twist and turn and attribute things to me.
They throw on me my own weaknesses.

So I hush and I moved further and made sand castles there.
Just like I dream!
The sand castles and my dreams, Shared something
“My ownership”
So I think this defines me?

 So when I was there alone just with my skin,
I embraced the moment with all the scars and the flaws and my thoughts,
And wrote my name down there,
With my sand castle.
I am not sure if I had pride, but I had love within me for that name.

There’s a child beneath this skin,
That I have nurtured throughout my life.
Throw stones at me
But that child is gonna be safe.
I promise today!

Beneath my bra and my underwear,
Lies a whole new world,
That is far beyond your galaxy of mindsight.
And your breadth of view of this world.
Far beyond what you can ever understand.

So, I listen to you,
Quietly and patiently..
To What you have recognised me as..!

The daily grief

I haven’t posted anything new since a while on the blog or anywhere. But, this is just a little piece that’s so close to my heart and which everyone here would relate to, so I thought of sharing it.

Everyone have there own phases, the break down phases. I was going through a lot of stuff too. I’ll write about that soon and for which I hope and I always know that on wordpress I can be exactly what I want. I don’t need to think twice before keeping my thoughts. So I know I wouldn’t be judged for who “the type of girl I am” or “how good or bad I am”😊

GRIEF may be a thing we all have in common, but it looks different on everyone. It isn’t just death we have to grieve. It’s life, it’s loss, it’s change. And when we wonder why it has to suck so much sometimes, it has to hurt so bad.
The thing we gotta try to remember is that it can turn on a dime. That’s how you stay alive when it hurts so much that you can’t breathe! That’s how you survive. By remembering that one day somehow, impossibly, it won’t feel this way. It wont hurt this much.
Grief comes in it’s own time for everyone in it’s own way. So, the best we can do, the best anyone can do, is try for honesty. The really crappy thing, the very worst part of grief is that you can’t control it. The best we can do is try to let ourselves feel it when it comes and let it go when we can.


Amidst the mountains and the beautiful sky.
The fresh air around gave her something she was looking for lately.
That was something she wasn’t able to find anywhere
Not in the warmth of mother’s love
Not even in the protective embrace of father
Not even a coffee date with just herself
Neither could her long gone lover would be able to give.
Nor could a long day with best friend.

Nature has a different role to play.
Nature has a vibe of freshness,
An aura of novelty.
that touches her soul and cleanses it.
Like a bud blooming into a flower.
That washes the brain off the stressful layers
And brings her the light of change.

Amidst the water falling down the mountains and the pleasant sunlight,
There’s a joy that doesn’t have any substitute.
A feeling that doesn’t let the smile on her face, fade.
An ecstasy with no constant relay of thoughts.
So its, Just ecstasy!

Amidst the rainbow in the sky and the chilly breeze, post the rainfall.
The air that blows her long hair
Which causes her hair strands fall on her face.
the chilly wind makes her soul bath.
It causes the ruffling of the leaves.
Producing a sound,
As if the leaves are whispering amongst each other.
That breeze feels like diving in the holy river.
It has the magic of purifying.
And taking away the burden from the soul.

Told her the preciousness of achieving the inner peace.
Because one cannot understand if one hasn’t experienced it.
It gave her satiety with what she had.
It gave her the gratitude for whatever is around her.
It’s like she gave them all her ears,
But she only had hers.
She was contented.
She had faith.
She forgot about the problems.
She did not think about what all she has gone through.
Not even about how unfair this world is at times.
She didn’t want to care about what will happen ahead.
Not about the future plans and her always so focused dreams.
It didn’t scare her in that moment.

Perhaps, she definitely knew
And she believed ,
In that very moment,
that things will certainly fall in place.
The broken pieces will adjoin and
Ameliorate into something better
and great.
So that’s exactly where it is bliss!



Pictures’ location- Mcleodganj, Dharamshala, India.



Layer over layers.
Pretentiousness overloads
Mirror itself doesn’t portray the gospel truth
What is it then?
What’s  the actuality of it?
What were we?
What are we becoming into?
The conscience?
Oh that never fades.
So what is it that is happening?
Where are we going?
What is this gonna lead to?
The expression is fading
the power of expression is lost.
We curb it.
It rises and we smother it.
The superficial makeup layers,
Do their tasks efficiently
And indeed sufficiently!
Nobody gets to know the Candor

The constant motion of thoughts
Has lost their path.
We don’t feel the motion anymore.
There are no thoughts.
We don’t know where we are heading to.
We don’t know about the verity of it.

Darkness had its say then
But, Darkness doesn’t take place anymore now.
We don’t let it take place.
Aversively pushing it away.
We don’t let it come near.
The constant motion of thoughts and emotions
Oh there are now no thoughts and emotions.

We are just flowing with the stream.
Taking its turns
With the breeze.
But when darkness arrives
We run away.
So what is the truth?
Is it that what we are running away from?
Or that which is still here?
Or there, there is no truth?
May be it’s somewhere else.

So we try and fall asleep
Aversively pushing all of these,
possibilities away.
But we are scared of the darkness that arrives.
It arrives with the thoughts and emotions
And cries and disappointments.
So we are scared to sleep.
Darkness doesn’t have a specific feature.
Darkness can’t be touched.
Darkness has a definite voice.
And that scares us.
Darkness talks a lot.
Darkness can touch you.
Darkness know you and what you feel.
So you push it away.
Because Darkness knows the gospel truth.
It can take you to it.
It can let it come to you and find you.
And that is exactly what you don’t want to know.
Gospel truth is exactly what you don’t want to know
That is exactly what you don’t want to possess.
But that is the Gospel truth